The Huckster

There's something scary about the South.

I love warm weather, steak for breakfast, ubiquitous sweet tea, and women who wear dresses to college football games. But the political stylings of them good ol' boys make me think (and wish) that we live in a different country.

McCain won the Northeast, as expected, with comfortable margins of victory in New Jersey, New York, Connecticut, and Delaware. Those margins of victory were over second-place finisher Mitt Romney, who only managed to carry Massachusettes in this part of the country.

Totally different story in the South, however, with evangelical zealot Mike Huckabee carrying Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, West Virginia, and Mississippi. I can't imagine the intellectual bankruptcy that would allow me to vote for a hateful, gay-bashing moron, who believes the world is 6000 years old. One of the analysts on CNN last night joked that "Nobody is more conservative than Huckabee. He doesn't believe in evolution or gravity or photosynthesis or anything." (I'm not sure if he watches Family Guy, but coincidentally, earlier in the evening TBS showed the episode where Mel Gibson walks off Mount Rushmore, and Peter declares "Christians don't believe in gravity.")

Luckily, Huckabee's appeal is so limited outside of the South, he has almost no chance of winning the nomination. But I'm embarrassed for my countrymen who think our country needs a president even more evangelical and less rational than the monkey.