Friday, February 22, 2008

This just in!

I personally find this difficult to swallow, but it seems that old, powerful men are attracted to hot young women - and even stranger - they are sometimes tempted to have sex with them.

Scandalous! Although we live in a country where 60% of men and 40% of women are fooling around on their spouse* the critics are lining up to attack McCain for (possibly) porking a blonde who's half his age.

I wonder how high those numbers would be if all married men were routinely subjected to a similar temptation. Late at night, on a private jet, you drink a few to unwind after a long day...and this much younger girl, your lobbyist 'friend', sidles up next to you. Bear in mind, she's paid by the amount of access she can generate for her clients. How many sexually functioning men - the straight kind, not the married gay kind - are saying 'no' here? Exactly. I love my wife, but my best chance of coming out of that unscathed is to avoid the situation completely (on a smaller scale, of course, I don't have a senator's access to young hotties or private jets.) It doesn't seem all that far to fall.

We've recently endured scandals by esteemed Congressmen who were IMing dirty fantasies to underage boys while they were supposed to be voting, or eliciting gay sex from strangers in an airport bathroom. God forbid that McCain might have engaged in a little afternoon delight with a 40-year-old professional whore lobbyist that he'd worked with for years. Somehow, despite this huge personal failing, I expect he'll be able to do a better job than the idiot who's been living in the White House for the last 8 years.

Get over it, hypocrites.

*This is a fascinating statistic. It is quoted ubiquitously, generally attributed to the Monogamy Myth book, which itself offers no conclusive evidence for these numbers. "Numerous studies" and "recent studies" are cited, but nothing concrete. Amazingly, this lack of evidence has done nothing to stop this statistic from being endlessly repeated. The actual numbers are hard to pinpoint, since their accuracy relies on self-reporting, but are probably closer to 40% and 30%. Still, I chose to cite the numbers that made my point stronger.

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